When you first got into your relationship, you probably couldn’t wait to get intimate with your partner. You might have gone on a few dates, progressed from holding hands to a peck on the cheek to passionate kissing, and when you finally had sex for the first time, it was super exciting.
With time, however, any couple’s relationship is bound to experience some dips in intimacy levels and in how much you both enjoy the sex you have together. This is normal, and you don’t need to worry about it, but you can do something to improve the situation. Here are some tips to improve intimacy in your relationship.
Talk to your partner
Whenever you encounter issues in your relationship, whether related to intimacy or anything else, your first point of call should always be to tell your partner how you’re feeling. It’s easy to imagine that you’re the only one feeling that way or to feel embarrassed discussing intimate issues, even—strangely enough—with your own partner. However, unless you say something, the situation is unlikely to change. What’s more, as you explain to your partner how you’re feeling, you might discover that they’re feeling the same way!
The best time to start a conversation with your partner about your intimacy issues is when you are both relaxed and have enough time to really get into the matter without having to keep checking the time. If you have kids, wait until they have gone to bed—there’s nothing like a little one demanding something from you to kill off the conversation! Make sure you explain clearly how you’re feeling, and give your partner time to tell you how they’re feeling, too.
Explore new possibilities
As you talk to your partner, don’t be afraid to tell them if you would like to try something new, such as buying some new sex toys or roleplaying a certain scenario. Visit a sex toy website, such as Wet For Her, and explore their range—there will be something to suit all tastes! If you have a fetish, that’s not something to be ashamed of—share it with your partner, if you haven’t already, and ask them if they would be willing to try it out with you. The worse they can say is no, and they may well surprise you by sharing some of your fantasies!
Some people may feel awkward approaching the topic of sex at the time when they’re not actually having sex. However, once you’re in the heat of the moment, it’s easy to just carry on the way you always have and regret it afterward. Sitting down to have an intentional conversation about your sex life will give you both the time and space you need to tell each other what you like, what you don’t like, and what you would like to try out.
Sometimes all you need to spice up your sex life is to have sex in a new place. When you live together, it’s easy to just default to the bed—after all, it’s probably the most comfortable surface in the house! Changing it up, however, will feel exciting and will give your relationship some much-needed spark, so don’t be afraid to experiment.